Andreas Airfield: The Aftermath of a Transformers Orgy

Richard Heathcliff Cliff Richard Heath…Cliff

Basically, he’s a right mad fucker who lives among the untamed moors, foraging berries and wrestling with wolves. A gypsy Mowgli who’ll treat you like a bastard. Heathcliff: keeping Cathy’s keen since the 18th century.

The 2 Wise Men. RIP the third lesser-spotted Arbuckle Chuckle.

But no. We realise, of course, the term ‘circuit breaker’ is an altogether less whimsical beast. It is, instead, a front-runner in the pseudo-bollocks COVID word Olympics. The kind of term designed by committee, and festooned upon the general public like garlands of actual human shit, to be worn with spurious pride.

‘slug’. If you know, you know (I don’t know).

This is a wonderland for the kids, as it was for my wife growing up. To me, this is part post-modern art exhibition vomiting into a skip; part end-of days Mad Max dystopian hellscape. But mostly, it’s the mechanical aftermath of a Transformers orgy. A groggy-headed Optimus Prime waking up with 15 exhausts in his hands and a forklift up his arse.

Anonymous: The Famous War Poet.

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